Jerome comes over with pizza and beer.  The kitchen table and
counters are full of newspapers and dishes and books and cartons and
flies and beach rocks.  So they sit on the bench out back, but Jerome
stands after a while because he says the bench feels like it’s going to
give.
Jerome tells Ivan to hurry up and finish so they can get going
on their plan.  “First of all, you have to really want a woman.  Because
you’ve had ideas before, right, like with that pigeon coop and also law
school.  So I need to hear from you now on this one because we can just
walk away here.”
“Everyone says I shouldn’t be alone.”
“OK, good, so we’re ready to proceed here then?  The thing
I’m all for about you getting a woman is she’ll keep you tip-top, you
know?  You get a woman, you’ll be busy, guaranteed.  OK, so how would
you say you see yourself on this one?”
“I could be active.”
“I’m talking are you happy, are you whole?  Which I would say
you are.  I would say you’re pretty much OK but kind of shy, kind of
different in an unusual way which makes you seem, you know, not the same
as anyone else but really you are just like us in the sense of women
being crazy and incredible at the same time and you wanting some of that
in your life, right?  So I’m thinking the perfect woman for you is
quiet.  So we’ll get you a quiet girl, OK?”